There is Only One Problem

This isn’t rocket surgery - George Bush (though the quote was used before him)

This post is specific to helping professionals; however, I encourage non-helping professionals to read it to get an idea of the ridiculousness that happens behind the scenes! Its also pretty short and might help you understand how we can sometimes overly complicate the simple things.

I have taught, supervised, counseled, consulted, and interacted with thousands of humans over my career. During my short-ish career I have watched different therapy trends come and go, leaving behind excited and confused counselor trainees. Its a tough balance, as I love advancement, but I also see our tendency to rehash the same concepts in new forms with limited growth. I suppose that’s what progress looks like though. Fast at first, then slowing.

This post will describe the one and only presenting problem, issue, concern that humans face. People show up in therapy offices for this one reason, and no other reason. We can add fancy words, terms, techniques, or nonsense; but there is only one problem. There may be diagnoses, career issues, drug use, family issues, trauma etc; but the problem is always the same. My hope with this post is that someone will read it and learn the beauty of simplification. Start with this, build from here and then go back as needed.

Ok, So What is the Problem?

Full transparency here. I considered taking a cue from online recipes, and writing a long pointless story about summer days, the smell of grandmothers in the kitchen, and the echo of children’s laughter to string you along. Cmon, man just give me the recipe; so here it is!

The One Issue for All

Things are not like I want them to be.

That’s it; every single cause of distress can be distilled down to this key point. Buddhism already discovered this, but I am happy to take credit for it.

In my various roles teaching and supervising students and trainees I have learned a lot in the process. One behind the scenes fact, is that there are times I have no clue what the supervisee is talking about. I often ask trainees “what is this client’s presenting issue?” (aka why is this person in therapy?). Trainees’ answers vary, but often include random information about childhood attachment, things the supervisee is doing (not the question!) little professors, traumatic bonding, firemen, ego states, physiology etc. Often, these concerns and perceptions are accurate: However, there are also many instances where the lingo and nonsense have clouded the process so much, that the trainee is just saying random words that don’t make any sense.

Conclusion

I told you this was short! Humans are complex creatures, who are also remarkably simple. Therapy trends and terms will come and go, and some things will stick whereas others won’t. The Buddhist concept of suffering (or Dunbarian if you prefer to credit me!) seems to be sticking around. When we, or our clients, suffer, its generally rooted in things not being the way we would like them to be. There are a million directions to go from there, but that’s our starting point no matter what little professors, firemen, or childhood attachments tell us.

When in doubt simplify. Actually, no, just simplify even if you are not in doubt.